Category: My Insights

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Journey My Insights

The Hills & My Daughter – & the dance called soul-searching

Last month, my 5-year-old daughter and I went on a trip to a small village in Uttarakhand, Nathuakhan. We lived in a homestay that I stayed in twice before in 2016; once when I went on a solo trip and another time with my family. I have wanted to take her there to rediscover it through her eyes, to revalue it through my eyes, but this time being a mother. I cannot thank my stars to give me this idea to go there just with her and really breaking the usual monotony of traveling. Many of my friends, family, and acquaintances were surprised about my plan, and yet I could see how excited they were for me to experience it. Everyone around me was so amazed that I thought of something like this and were really waiting for me to come back and listen to my experience and look at our photos. We truly started the trip with everyone’s positive blessings.

And I loved every moment of that trip, my daughter explored herself thoroughly. We climbed hills each day, soaked in the beautiful views and greenery, played in the river streams, visited a local school, relished local mountain food, drank fresh and clean water coming down from the mountains, collected pine cones and painted them, drew the village on our drawing paper, slept peacefully in the afternoons, collected peaches and helped the locals and played in rainwater. She truly showed me that place through her own eyes, and I did nothing but follow her innocent steps. She made me her exploring partner and showed me that we could complement each other in the routine of school or home and in a place without a routine or structured things to do. The trip was so good that leaving our mother-daughter connection without a single soul around us and returning to routine was far harder for us than I imagined.


Looking back, the motherhood journey hasn’t been easy for me. My expectations of what motherhood will be were derived from a place of naivety and infatuation. I truly felt it would be straightforward, and could do it all without hassle. But, it took effort. I had my daughter when I was 29, but in my heart, I was still a child wanting to just love, travel and earn enough money to have fun. No real goal or passion or path was laid out before me. I never considered sacrificing each day, and having the same routine every day with a single purpose in life was a part of the plan. But taking care of a child on my own, taking a backseat in my career, and my husband suddenly growing up and becoming an entrepreneur who now prioritizes earning money and achieving greater things in life over being around me was too much to take in. I never imagined myself to be revolving around a child; I just wasn’t that person. But that happened. Initially, I thought it was just a phase and would pass in a year and a half at the maximum. But it stayed far longer than I anticipated. Gradually and, at times, unknowingly, I kept sulking and getting dragged into negativity and insecurities.


Maybe in the last 8-10 months, I have settled. I have accepted that my life is this and that this child is everything to me, and I am everything to her. And this trip felt like a great way to celebrate that.


My daughter may have suffered from my negativity and my husband’s absence a lot; in fact, I am sure she did. But throughout these 5 years or more, I not even once regretted being with her, being her mother. As a matter of fact, I kept feeling guilty about being in those emotions or having a personality that attracts negative thoughts easily. I always felt that this girl is precious with a beautiful and kind heart and deserves a better mother. But the phrases a better or good or a great mother are all subjective and full of comparisons, and I realized these thoughts weren’t right.

My husband and I had good careers before my daughter was born, and we spent good 7 years being with each other before her birth. But our world started with each other, and we were only priorities of each other. And we had no one to answer to, no one to take care of, no friend circles, and everything was simple and easy and full of connectedness, intimacy, respect, and each other’s physical & emotional presence. That equation completely changed with my daughter, and although we thought we would get back to what it was, we never did. We were wrong; I know we goofed up with this thought process. We were never supposed to find that connection again; we were supposed to find a new direction to the relationship, new ways to contribute to each other’s lives, and new methods to make each other happy with her at the center. But we forgot about ourselves and our relationship. We stopped doing anything that would count toward the betterment of marriage or elevate the husband-wife relationship. My only priority was she, her happiness, well-being, nurturing, and upbringing; his only priority was his work and business. We drifted apart and came along the loneliness, slight depression disturbed family calculations, and fighting weekends. But now things are settling down, and the clouds are clearing. We are regaining our footing in parenthood; he can let go of a few things in his business and be present for both of us. And I am a much more confident and all-the-way-through mom than before. And this trip didn’t just make us aware of what we need to work on but also showed us how much we mean to each other and how much we need each other. It showed how my daughter holds us together, and we both hold the family.


Before this, I was a girl who constantly sought attention, love, and happiness in things and people around me. And even though I still fall into the same trap many times today, it settles me now to know that my daughter finds her happiness in me, in both of us and in us as a unit. And that gave me wings, that gave me a home. She’s an extension of me, a better version of me – almost like a guiding light that put our lives on track and for the better.


I know I am a fine mother (although I sometimes doubt myself). The childhood experiences, free environment, and conscious efforts I take for her to be a beautiful, gentle, and strong human being are worth patting my back for. Despite my limitations, I am doing a great job and will continue to do it. But maybe now on with a lot more positivity. And this trip put me on that path.

A friend said a line the other day that the more you invest in yourself to be happy, calm, strong, and a mindful parent, the better childhood your kids will have. How true is that! And how much I want that to happen!

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My Insights

Writing & Ranting!

It’s been a while since I have written, and although I am trying hard to come up with a topic to write about today, I cant. I don’t know what I have got to say about my life or the surroundings or the situations in life. All I know is that my love for writing is creeping back in.

The need to express, the need to have my words read by others, the need for others to relate to my words, and the need to make a difference are coming back! I want to say things and envision myself as the writer; I once dreamt of being, and I want to make someone’s day or a minute by giving them something that moves them a little. It’s not easy for me to start writing again. There is a lot of baggage, a fear of judgment and making mistakes, and a feeling of weakness in a way that may be I am using writing as a means to relieve some of the stress or the inadequacy I have in my life. My mind is cluttered, my days are full, and my responsibilities don’t leave me any time to sit quietly for a minute; it’s just too chaotic for me to relax and write. But, I have a feeling, a one that’s not disappearing. Someone or something inside me is telling me that – this is it! This is your chance to start working towards your dream or happiness; this is the turning point. If you lose this chance, it will be challenging to go on and find peace anywhere else on this earth.

Not just me, but maybe family needs this too. My sanity is probably dependent on this. And the need to be heard requires me to start making space for writing, putting discipline and structure to it. It is hard; it is tough for me, but I am going to try.

If I find my long-gone solace and peace in writing and expressing, I may be able to regulate my emotions better. Maybe I can regain control of my happiness, which currently depends on other people and situations. I need this mechanism to work; I need my writing to be a replica of everything I want to say about myself and the world.

Nothing relaxes me anymore, not the smokes, not the sex, not the booze, or not the lovely time with my daughter, and a few days ago, I realized even solo travel doesn’t calm me anymore. Maybe I am a shitty writer who knows necessary English, but I am a storyteller, and I want to bring that storyteller to the front now. She has been struggling to survive for too long; it’s time to show her some light and give her some muscles.

Let’s see where this goes!

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My Insights

That freaking daydreaming boat!

My husband believes I live on a daydreaming boat where all my wishes and fantasies show me what I want them to, and it is not real. In reality, no one can live life as I imagine it to be. No one can find someone who can ignite the passion or the interest in life or career and not hamper the reality of your day-to-day life. He says there cannot be two sides of you that want two completely conflicting things which can co-exist and yet have the ability to co-destroy your life. The one that can destroy cant create!

But I don’t believe that. I feel every person brings something new, something different in your life. They make you who you are on that day, in that week, in that year. They influence your thoughts, routine, and choices, but it is entirely up to you to keep prioritizing. Nothing can destroy you if you keep it in balance, and one day you will lose that balance, but then you will make efforts to get back up and put it in place. And that’s what life is about. Trying to strike that balance between who you are, what you are expected to be, what you want to be, or who you want to be with.

My husband, though, has a simple life, and I am happy for him for that. He sees life in black and white and doesn’t wander. He is focused, committed, on track, and in it 100% whether it is his work, child, or marriage. He is fully there, and he has no confusion or a need to see the other side of how it can be. I wish I was like that; he deserved a girl like that. But sadly, he doesn’t have one.

He doesn’t know, or maybe he does – That I am a living example of everything complex and conflicting yet beautiful in its own ways and colorful in its own ways. I am a doting mother and a considerably committed and responsible wife who puts her husband and daughter before her a million times. But, I am also a woman who is desperately looking for love or a passion that moves my earth and sky. More like a drug so intense that it will make me forget everything I am or want to be for a few hours or days. I am an example of conflicting thoughts that coincide and separate simultaneously about my sexual desires, marriage and motherhood, career and writing, OR simply about who I am right now Vs. who I secretly desire to be.

I wish it was simpler! I wish it was easier! I wish my life would have started and ended on my daughter and husband! I wish I didn’t want the things I wanted in life! I wish what I want was crystal clear! I wish I had the guts to choose, but I don’t!

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My Insights

Pretzels!

The pain isn’t that we both are now all grown-up and have responsibilities. The pain is that in between those balancing acts of life, he forgot he is leaving me behind every day. That that money will fill the house but not the heart. That holding hand was once a natural phenomenon but now feels like an act of PDA, eventually leading to – Maybe it’s better, let’s not hold it at all.

We aren’t doing this purposely, even he isn’t. But this is how we have chosen to compromise. Years of putting relationship over everything else has now led us to keep the relationship at the farthest distance. But I miss him. I freaking miss everything about us.

Isn’t that what I keep saying about everything and everyone in my life? At times I feel I am a super pessimist and an unfulfilled personality that would see the half glass empty all her life. Maybe he doesn’t even like me anymore, but do I like myself? Does anyone like me anymore?

Idk; my life is like a twisted pretzel without a clear path or a start and end. Crispy, tasty, and unpredictable from the outside but very predictable at the same time. And like when one pretzel isn’t enough, for me, one complicated situation isn’t enough in my life. It has to be in multiples and equally mysterious and adventurous. Isn’t that what he knows about me? Or maybe he forgot! All these years, none of us remember what the other one likes; all lines have blurred, but the fire to make it tasty and worthwhile remains. Oh yea, I am still talking about the pretzels. Yes, the same ones I craved for in my entire pregnancy.

He and I two peas in a pod, never leaving each other’s side but constantly trying to look away from each other! Did I say I miss him?

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My Insights

Grass is always greener on the other side…

Frankly, I never felt like that about anything in my life. As far as I remember, I have always been very contented with my relationships, my family or my individual life so to say. There have been days when I cribbed about having no money, pathetic job or the behaviour of people around me. But the feeling of ‘they have it better’ never ever crossed my mind. I am still very clear about having the best of parents, the most amazing brother – well in fact – a lot better version than me and a gem of a husband.

But yesterday night for the first time in my life, I felt that I am not enough. That I am not the best possible option for a wife for my husband. I am completely aware of my personality and the pros & cons it comes with. But I have always lived my life for last 10 years knowing – that my loved ones don’t mind the way I am and the way I am not.

Till date, the most I valued in my life is relationships. Quite often I screw them up, but I recreate and build them again too. I have always conquered that part of my life. Job, Money, Friends, Socializing, Partying, Fun…everything else was the last priority in front of spending time with family or doing something for them. That could also be a reason I don’t have a lot of friends, I don’t belong to n number of whatsapp groups, I don’t earn as much as I could have OR simply I am not liked as much as my Husband/Brother/Parents are liked in their circles.

I would always choose a nice dinner / a movie over a party OR a long drive over a night-out with bunch of people. I would choose to have cosy celebrations than loud music and strangers. I would choose a book or a romantic movie at home over a socializing attempt with relatives or friends.

I don’t like chaos, I need it quite. I don’t like loud, I like it cosy. I don’t like it with fake smiles & strange faces around, I like it known & comfortable. And that’s how I have been living my life and frankly I don’t see a problem in that. More than that, I have lived hearing from my loved ones that it is perfect, that it doesn’t matter – & you don’t need to fit in, you don’t need to change. But guess what, that bubble broke yesterday night!

After all, your personal desires ARE ABOVE anyone else’s way of living. It does overpower at some point of time. I know that better than anyone!

I have had my moments of realization this week! But this tops the list.. What changes after this? Well frankly nothing! But the after effects will definitely make me think twice before speaking a word / making a plan / expecting anything from anyone! It’s not really a good feeling to know that well you could have been a better version of a wife / a descent version of a THIS GENERATION woman..

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Journey My Insights

Struggle to cut through the regulars..

Many of our relationship issues are connected to our disappointments with ourselves. I strongly believe that since some time. The ego trips, clashes or disagreements that one has on a usual basis in the house are mostly because of the disappointment you have about how your life is going on right now.

For example, I love to take vacations and travel. If I get to do that often I’m a different person altogether. Everything else that I need to take care of OR not working out properly becomes a miniature issue. I sail through pretty fine from it.

I believe it is all a vicious circle where you are disappointed with yourself, then you find yourself helpless in some way, then you are disappointed that your life is not going the way you want it go, that its not so exciting any more, then you are disappointed in your spouse that he/she is not doing enough to make a difference in it, that he/she is engrossed in their individual lives more than us as a couple, then no matter how much you try to pull it altogether it just keeps falling apart. Life seems awesome for a few days and is very stagnant on others. For a while there is an ultimate warmth & intimacy in relationships and you find it vanishing eventually.

Unless you have your goals, plans and dreams jotted down. Unless you really have something to look forward to. Unless after every few years you recreate your relationships and what you want in life. Unless you and your spouse are partners in love or better in crime too 😉

Its easier said than done. That’s the exact reason why I am struggling big time right now. My mentor from my ‘Effectiveness Seminar – Landmark Education‘ that I am attending made a point last Saturday. He said, ‘Life or anything in your life is never stagnant. Its either expanding or contracting. You need to take some actions to make sure you are always expanding.’ It was a ‘Ting’ moment for me. Did I not know this before? Well I did, that’s the exact reason why I joined the Effectiveness seminar but somewhere down the line I lost my focus from what exactly I want to alter in my life.

He made another point that, ‘You will find yourself in stage of Stability when you find yourself bored, not excited or things start looking as regular’ That is a stage where you feel the need of more. Because when you come to a stage of Stability you gotta Expand. You gotta make new plans, focus on new goals, change what’s been regular and fill excitement in your life. If you don’t, you start contracting and you find yourself often disappointed than happy.

I realised at that moment, that this stage has come in my married life and/or in my individual life. Where it needs a newness. Something that will alter tomorrow.

I don’t know the entire list of things that will make a difference. But I want to start with small projects or goals that I can see now. Like taking up writing my novel, losing weight, planning a long vacation, taking a month’s break from work for writing, looking for a specialised job, moving to a different city/country and having a baby.

The plan is not concrete yet. But I have realized by now that I have high expectations from myself. And if I don’t live up to them then I am disappointed with myself. And then clearly I am disappointed with the world. And if I make plans and complete them then I am a sorted human being who hardly has issues with what’s going on around. I have also noticed that if I take out time and do what I love like writing my novel then I’m a calmer human being which eventually may lead to harmony and warmth in my relationships.

So consider this as a declaration that I am writing my novel. I am about 4500+ words down, with first few scenes laid down on the paper. I am shit scared as to what will happen next or whether I will ever complete it. But its keeping me sane, its keeping on top of things, its giving me a sense of completeness so I am writing. And the target is to complete it before my birthday in September. Sort of like a present to myself !

Here I have, something to look forward to…but still gotta keep the spark alive and work on the rest of the list…. 🙂

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My Insights Observations

Disturbing thought provoking news..of a girl I hardly knew!

A girl in my office committed a suicide this Friday.

We received a condolence message on Saturday morning, my heart sank a bit but I came out of it in a few moments. I thought I will not remember it again. But it came back, again and again. I hardly knew her, just saw her doing make-up in the powder room few times. I was wondering what may have caused her death, and heard one of her friend talking it out loud that she committed suicide over a, break-up.

Suicide over a break-up with a guy, is it that simple to die?

I’m having a hard time getting it out of my head. It is difficult to realise that you never know who will be alive tomorrow and who won’t. It is scary to know that there exists a power beyond your brain which controls you. I am scared, I truly am. And extremely sad that people don’t have love around them to hold them back from doing something like this.

I know how a break-up makes you feel, its a phase which only some can survive from.

One guy who is the center of your universe till one moment, is just not there anymore. Your morning, afternoon, evening and night revolves around him. Your likes, dislikes, dreams, wishes, achievements, failures and practically everything is shaped up around him. He is your lover, elder brother, best friend, companion, saviour and partner in crime. He is one person who makes you who are. You just fucking don’t remember yourself without him, you just cant imagine yourself without him. And he is just not there anymore. He is just a shadow, a dream, an imaginary figure which doesn’t fit in your fingers, who is just an illusion when you try to take him close.

A part of you dies the day someone you love so much goes away for ever. You can never be that person again. You can never love the way you loved again. You can feel the hole in your heart, it will stay empty forever. It’s crazy, its horrible to be in such situation. But, what I also know is that you move on. You survive, you sail through, you live again. The emptiness remains but colours do get back in life.

Don’t know what she went through, don’t know why she did what she did. It is just so sad for the family and the lover who’s left behind. People left behind face the horrible destiny more than the one who dies. Irony of life and break-ups.

I always think that, one should be with a guy who grows to become your strength not your weakness. And yet, no matter how much you love someone – no guy is worth dieing for!

What can I say more, May her soul rest in peace!

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My Insights Observations

Acclimatization

Acclimatization
Source – Wikipedia, Google

Read this word on a travel website! We leave you to acclimatize with the climate for the rest of the day.. I felt as if there is a ring to this word. Acclimatize..Acclimatize..Acclimatize 😉

Really, don’t we all do this all the time? Try to acclimatize, from the constant changes in life to the changes inside you. Life as we know it, gives us away at many circumstances and how we deal with them is our process of acclimatization.

I remember going to the college away from my parents for the first time. Leaving the hostel every morning, walking down the small alley to the college building. All alien faces around, everyone with million colored clothes with another billion expressions on their faces. Walking down the campus roads all alone with a backpack and series of questions with blood rushing fast through the heart or brains (whatever it may be). I can still feel what I felt that time.

Being afraid, Being scared and Being excited are not so different things when you are standing at the beginning of the next chapter and at the end of being a child – safe, secure and cared for at home. Right from the climate to roads, from food to the taste, from hostel room to the rough bed, from strangers to people who stare, from a huge campus to the college kattas just everything was new and yet not so exciting or satisfying. I gotta admit, somehow I never liked any of that as much as I liked being with my parents and brother. So I guess I never quite got acclimatized to the whole staying away thing or the college thing.

Relevance of this word doesn’t end here. It reflects in everyday.

We play many roles in our life. People Change. You change. Situations change. Life changes every minute & all we try in our life is to Acclimatize. All the time. 

I told you there is a ring to this word, which just struck many chords.

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My Insights

The Last Lear.. Movie that remains with you!

I am no actor or performer neither have I read Shakespeare’s plays. But I can understand the language! Language of expressions, tone of voice and the meaning hidden under the lines.

The Last LearThe Last Lear is a movie of a passionate eccentric and Old stage performer of Shakespeare’s plays and a contented rational director along with a Model turned actress struggling to make her way through acting and marriage both.

When I think about it, I am confused as to What I liked the most! The story or Amitabh Bacchchan’s performance or the minute elements in the story which made all the difference. I don’t know, I can’t categorize the movie based on any of this.

It is just splendid, wonderful, realistic, different, creative and has tremendous amount of depth. Not a single moment you realize that you are watching Hindi Film actors with Indian emotions in an English language movie. Every small detail is bang on – whether it is the Look of the actors or the locations and to every emotion they express.

The Last LearAmitabh Bacchchan’s work in The Last Lear is by far the best work I have seen at this age. He paints a picture of those Shakespeare’s scenes, he lives those characters and takes you there. It gets as real as it can get in a cinema. Love, Relationships, Friendship, Commitment, Dedication and Ultimate Passion; he literally tells the meaning of these words through his acting.

With this movie, I once again realized how one thing in life drives people. They are obsessed, passionate, crazy and living for that one thing. Its the source of inspiration and also a way of life. You just cant live any other way later on. It possesses you. Just like Paul walker, His passion was racing, he enjoyed it the most, he made it his work and hobby both, he loved it the most and unfortunately his end happened while racing. But that is the risk passionate people are ready to take, they are crazy enough to risk it all.

I wish, I am that sicknessly obsessed and passionate about something in my life ever.. I am longing for the day I discover my passion!

The Last Lear, this one’s gonna stay with me for long!

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Journey My Insights

It is September again..

It’s that time of the year again, month of September – my birthday month. This must be the first time I’m writing on the occasion of my birthday. What’s so special about this time? Nothing really.. It’s the past one year that has been special or rather eventful. Extremely eventful, so much so that at one point I felt the necessity of stagnant days.

I woke up today morning and somehow suddenly realized that its a birthday month and slowly all the events from past one year started appearing in front of my eyes. I am not so happy about how it went as I was at the most vulnerable self of mine. Just whisking away in the direction the wind was moving. But I also created some amazing things in my life, unleashed new side of my life that wasn’t explored before.

I started Dancing 🙂

Oh yes, I started dancing! I had this mind block about dancing  as long as I remember. I saw people around me eventually losing interest in dancing. One day, I found myself on the dance floor with my entire family and just did not look back. However I could, I just kept dancing for more than two hours with my besties. The moment of dancing with two best men in my life in unforgettable.

Since then, till today I have danced on few more occasions. Its funny how it works, when you start loving something you start getting more n more opportunities like that. I love it, I just love dancing now. I have always had this dream of learning Salsa, it definitely looks a real thing now 🙂

I kind of lost my best friends..

Ahh this is the most screwed part of the entire year probably, which kills me even today. Well by now, everyone who knows about me knows that I dont have much friends. I have just been like that since forever and I didn’t regret that fact till last year than before. Why? because your so called friends turn back on you and then you are left nowhere. With no one to talk, share or cry with.

Oh yes, I never believed it before but people only want the “GOOD part of YOU” nobody wants you when you are Cranky, Sad, Upset or specially Demanding. They don’t want you anymore because you are not behaving the same way as before. No one wants to change things around in that friendship and spend 10min on understanding what’s wrong but they are okay breaking, altering or leaving than just being there for you. I don’t leave, I cant. That’s not in my genes.

So I was left behind.. Feeling bad, lonely at the effect of how people make perceptions about you and change!

I learned a lesson, never be a Fool in Love..

Fools in love, are there any creatures more pathetic?
Fools in love, never knowing when they lost the game

Fools in love they think they’re heroes,
cos they get to feel no pain
I say fools in love are zeroes
I should know, I should know
Because this fool’s in love again – Inara George

Never think that, its going to stay the same way forever. Never depend on someone else for your happiness. You love too much is it, well its your problem!

I successfully pulled myself out of the Depression 🙂

This is the biggest achievement of the year by far! My family faced a lot in this period. I was as good as a ghost for many months. There but not quite. Thinking something else, talking something else. Shut in the home, not moving out. Not sharing, forget about having fun. Always crying. A laughter has to end with a cry. Just talking about leaving alone somewhere all the time. Talking of relocating alone somewhere all the time. Its not that I liked being depressed but I just could not understand what was going on. I wasn’t finding a way out of it.

But One day, I could see how people close to me were affected. And I just said, this is not how I’m repaying their contribution and love in my life. Then nothing could stop me till I broke the darkness.

I found the purpose of my life..

In a journey of Three months or so along with some unknown faces I went through a self-exploration journey, I found out the “Why” in my life. What Simon Sinek talks about in TED just doesn’t apply to businesses but I believe it also applies to our life. Why – Do – Have is the way to go in life.

I found that, the only passion and purpose of my life is “Making a Difference” in situations, in other peoples lives. What I do will only give me the satisfaction that I desire only when I work on my “Why”.

I became ONE with my family..

So much peace is back in life, I cant tell you. I am totally a different person because of this now. I went into the depth of every relation in my family and apologized where I needed to, created something new where I felt like and just involved them in smallest possible thing of my life. I took up being there biggest support and it has just changed the equation. All those small little voices irritating me have disappeared.

I love the air around my family.

I grew in my career..

I have been having big-time fall-outs in my career since last few years. But Last year was the golden year where I was totally in control of everything in my office. I learned so many new things, I produced revenue for the company, I created a responsible image of myself, I started working in niche sides of work where hardly anyone works, I kept myself away from the controversies and overcame all obstacles that came my way. I gained respect and experience like never before.

Whats next? Still figuring it out, but I will get there. As my dad always says, “You gotta keep on jumping to see whats on the other side”. I will.

I explored some beautiful desires of mine 🙂 🙂

Somewhere in that three month journey I started believing in my dreams. How crazy and unreal they might be, I started loving them. I started loving myself, which I thought was impossible before.IMG_20140727_073253

One of the things I am currently reading “Eat, Pray, Love” Elizabeth Gilbert has mesmerized me totally. I feel like I have lived every moment that Liz talks about. Now..

All I wanna do now is Go to Rome , alone or not I don’t know but I wanna see those places that she experienced of.

I also want to go on a Solo trip somewhere, I am still scared of it but now my passion for going is overpowering the fear of it.

I also want to go on a Writing workshop somewhere Out of India. I want to explore the world beyond through my experiences, my writing and set new standards for pleasures in my life.

I want to start my novel. I believe I cant write about characters, but I want to overcome that.

I guess this much eventfulness in the year is enough to speak about 😉 or else I may have turn this year into a novel. When i started this blog, I was shit interested in celebrating my birthday. But now, I am back baby! I want to celebrate my birthday just like always…

This one’s definitely dedicated to my family, the warriors of my life!

And yes how could I forget.. Modiji won the election this year!